Jeanne’s 50th!

Thank God it only happens once in a live time.  It took me nearly 50 years of preparation to make this a half decent day.  I now need 50 years of rest to recover from this epic day.  Just a birthday I hear you say – not on your live!  Let me explain:

The menu:

Pan seared rib roast, thin cut fries (chips for the uneducated in SA), mushroom and madeira sauce and a side salad of garden tomatoes with goats cheese and red onion.

Problem one:  Need a skillet big enough for the rib.  Yip, you’ve heard it correctly – BIG enough!!! As the saying go – a picture is worth – bla bla bla.

Jeanne 50th 4

So – back to the skillet – luckily Ludlow is well know for its cooking and cook shops.  So – forced (yes it was against my will – I had absolute no, but no other option to venture out and visit said cooking shops.  The result:

Jeanne 50th 3

This however was not the end.  Because as the great white hunter (yes Dad I am talking about you) would point out – No meal is a meal without a good bottle of wine.

To show my undying loyalty to my country of birth I bought this Brilliant bottle of Chilean Shiraz.

Jeanne 50th 2

But – I hear you ask what about the person who’s birthday this is?  Well what about her?  This is my blog, my steak, my skillet, my wine – what about her?

My preparation is not finished yet – well spotted – yes I am still missing flowers.  Do not fear – here it is:

Jeanne 50th 1

And after some minor rearrangement from this master interior designer and home decorator:

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Ok – ok – stop crying.  The birthday girl:

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Back to what matter.  The meal.

No – much more importantly – the CHEF:

Jeanne 50th 001

Ruben eat your hart out.

Fast forward to the result of the endless hours behind a scourging hot oven – the feast.

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On the table – being carved by a true artisan.

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For your “old” folks struggling with your eye sight.

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So – now all that is left is to contemplate and reminisce the last / first 50 years.  And even the cats joined in:Cat face

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So 5o years and counting.  Here is to the next 50!!

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I now need 50 years to recover from the 50 pounds of steak in my 50kg bodyWinking smile.

Goodbye 2010

The last day of 2010.

Thought of the day – it is all ready 2011 in Sydney.

What a year – looking back and the following “high lights” spring to mind.

January – tumour removed from left leg.

March – emergency removal of gall bladder.

May – rushed to A&E with suspected burst cornea – false alarm, thank god.

Total time from work – 9 weeks – yes it’s right – no work no pay – and I am out of pocket for more than two months salary.

Put on top of this the total and utter lack of certainty regarding work security and long term prospects and you get – the year best forgotten.  Let’s leave this one behind us and move on.

To summarise – not enough time for myself, not enough time for family and friends, to much worrying and not enough living.  NOT ENOUGHT TIME ON THE SHOOTING RANGE.

So – any new year resolutions?  No fuck that – just live everyday as if it is my last, sing as if nobody is listening, dance as if nobody is watching etc., etc..

Now to the main event – the year in pictures:

April 2010:

The big white hunter turns 75.

Pa-75 7

 

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Summer 2010 (European)

A true reflection of the year to date.

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But there is always a game fair somewhere to cheer you up.

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And my local butcher does support my sport and culinary taste.

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December 2010

Birmingham German Market:

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And so – onwards to 2011 – happy new year to everybody.

Office 2010

Testing Office 2010

So far I have to admit that I absolutely love it. Took some time to get used to Office 2007. Now it is just brilliant – little changes from 2007 to 2010 – but it is an improvement.

I really do like the new Office.

Now going to give the “publish to blog” feature a test.

Not sure if I will be very impressed with the formatting options – just first impressions.

 

 

The day I lost the use of my tongue

It is 9pm and I am in my hotel room.Still in pain.Agony is a better word.To make matters worse my injury has also now spread.My tong has been harmed beyond repair and now my behind (beyond and behind – William Wordsworth eat your heart out) is acting up or down or not at all.

Being a resident of Braveheart’s country (Scotland is part of the UK and the prime minister is Scottish so I can claim residency of Scotland and any way I am in pain so do not argue with me) I though let me follow the advice from old Julius – “When in Rome – and all that shi..” so off I went to capture Cantina Mexicana, to be precise “La Rancherita”.And before you all jump to conclusions – it is not a whorehouse and I don’t have the clap.It is a “fine” Mexican restaurant.

So let me tell you about my hideous injury.

It all started with the tortilla chips and the dip served with it – when they asked me if it is to hot I said no it is actually quit mild.This was taken as a grave insult and a declaration of war.I then order some Burritos a la Diabla (for all you ignorant people back home – Diabla is Spanish for Devil!!).O holy sh.. (this is exactly what is currently wrong with my behind) – it was served with a side order of peppers.Well since I regularly buy bottled Jalapeno peppers when I make wraps I though this I will enjoy.

Well for the record – there is a MAJOR difference between Jalapeno and Habanero.I put one (yes it was little whole chillies) in my mouth.CARDIAC arrest – my heart rate shoot up to 500 beats per second – my eyes popped out – I could not see – I could not breath – and I definitely could not talk – my survival instinct was all that saved me – downed my beer – downed my glass of Pepsi – crawled over the table to the bowl of guacamole and allow me to say – even while the valley of darkness was opening in front of me I still could appreciate the fact that this was indeed very good guacamole – the avocado was the star of the show – not overpowered by too much tomatoes and cilantro (O for G… sake – it is coriander – you Philistines of culinary knowledge) – and THEN!!I took a bite of the burrito.I now know what it must have been at Chernobyl.One small nuclear device went off in my mouth.The good news was that the pain from the Habanera was now wiped out – so was my tong, any feeling still left in my body – any dandruff that I may have had – my stomach lining disappeared in one nanosecond – the other diners though I am a gymnast – why else would I be doing summersaults? – my hair turned into an Afro style – it was as if I’ve gurgled pure Napalm.

This is what great food is all about – I am an addict – can’t wait for tomorrow – I am going back and this time around will ask for extra chilli in my Burrito.

Viva Mexicana.

Ps.Can only imagine what senorita Rancherita must have been like.

The Dangers of Dieting

This is supposed to be a posting about my trip to the US. However getting there proved to be more of a mission than I ever thought it likely to be – and no it had nothing to do with customs or homeland security. Only one party to blame and that is Slimming World!!! I am going to sue the living … out of them – public humiliation – loss of dignity – and everything else I can think of as soon as I’ve recovered from this terrible ordeal and trama.

Never, never, never think about dieting and then flying with your old clothes. The one thing that Slimming World did not warn you about is the dangers in having to go thru airport security with a pair of jeans that is two sizes to big. They will ask you to remove your shoes and belt. The scanner will go "beep". They will ask you to stop and lift your hands for a body scan. YOUR PANTS WILL FALL DOWN!!

This is not something anybody should suffer in a crowded Birmingham departure hall. THIS IS DEFINITELY NOT SOMETHING YOU SHOULD THEN ALSO EXPERIENCE IN A CROWDED SCHIPOLL AIRPORT ON THE SAME DAY.

I did not sign up for Slimming World in order to loose my dignity – I signed up to loose weight – that’s all. Not pants and who knows what else.

I am typing this sitting in Detroit airport. I should have boarded hours ago but is currently refusing to go through another security checkpoint. I am now going to wolf down a half pound cheese burger and fries with a extra serving of onions rings and two pints of beer. Hopefully this will keep my pants up and enable me to continue on my journey.

The rest of my US experience will have to be in another post. Until then – do not diet and fly at the same time.

Midlands Game Fair

Just got back from the West Midlands Game Fair. There is just no words to describe it. Plus it turned out to be one of the best days this year weather wise. Since a picture is worth a 1000 words:

This is what it is all about.
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A quality stand for a quality product.
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Never to young to start.
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No – we did not go hungry
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See you at the next game fair. Happy hunting.

Borough Market – London

A Picture paints a thousand words. Well after visiting the Borough market I am still trying to recover – culinary overdose. Without further ado here is some photos.

The Tomato Stall
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Just Salads

Seafood Stall
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Olive Oils
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Bread and more Bread
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Wine to go with the food
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Monster Burger

Visited the Gourmet Burger Emporium last night.Was confronted by a monster burger.There is no way that I can do justice in trying to describe this burger.Maybe the photo will help you to understand.

How am I going to eat this?
London July 2008 012

Note the bottle as indication of the height of the burger.

And to top it all – it is the real thing!! When you are asked how you would like your burger patty you should start to suspect that the name (Gourmet Emporium) may not just be a marketing trick.

One word: Unbelievable!! Just unbelievable – the best burger ever.

The Big Move

We have survived the move to our new rental property. Lets just say that like the holocaust this is a event better not talked about. Mass murder was definitely on the agenda. However since I am calm, collected and not known for bad temper the move was survived by all involved.

As per most of the events in the live of the Uys-Clan you have to take the history in to account. In this case the initial selection of the property. Because we don’t want everybody to burst out in tears, few if any photos of our current home will be made available. However just to show what we COULD have been living in here is a couple of photos of the barn conversion.

The Barn Conversion
Barn 003

And as if this is not enough to make you feel sick. The next photo is showing the view. (Just the view alone is enough to kill for – I nearly did)

View from Barn
Barn 005

Ok – so the location (5 miles from closes village) did count against it. I wish we took photos of the interior as well. Absolutely stunning.

So in the end we did not move here. To summarise I will present to you a "before" and "after" photo of the oven pan. The rest of the house was not as bad, but the initial impression was not much better.

30 Dahn Drive 00130 Dahn Drive 011

Thanks to my interior designer skills the house is now a home.:grin:;)